Preaching to the Enchanted

Hail, traveller! The roads have been busy with everyone fleeing the Pit of the Demon King. So you're going South I see...

Yes, everyone's going South to the Domain of the Shadow Lord.

Well not 'everyone'. I'm going North, to the Holy Lands of Eternal Blessings, to live at the Bastion of Righteous Faith.

Never heard of it. Hopefully better than the Pit of the Demon King.

It is definitely an improvement on the Pit of the Demon King. No demonic screeching at night, no pissing blood from all the hexes, no swarms of enchanted children wandering around selling energy drinks. It's nice.

Yea, that last place was awful. Hopefully the Domain of the Shadow Lord works out better for everyone.

Right, I guess, but 'the Shadow Lord'...wasn't that the entity who founded the Pit of the Demon King? You know, back when it had all the free chocolate, and before all images transformed into Hitler overnight?

Yea, hopefully it goes better this time.

Right, although it went well last time, at least for the Shadow Lord, who actually started the Pit of the Demon King. I don't mean to be rude, but are you not making this decision, at least a little bit, because of the recent mass enchantments? It's just that I see a lot of people on the road heading South suddenly, and they're all going to the Domain of the Shadow Lord all at once. Last week he had no Domain, and this week, he's built seating for around a hundred million people, and everyone has decided - at the same time - that they're going.

No, I'm too strong-willed for the enchantments to affect me. I just want to check it out.

But you don't want to check out the Bastion of Righteous Faith?

Nah, not much happening there I'm guessing, since nobody's going.

Well not nobody (a few million actually...) but don't you think the enchantments are pushing people towards the Domain of the Shadow Lord, just a little?

Well of course! Everyone uses enchantments to gather people. Well maybe not your Bastion-place. I guess that's why there's nobody there, eh?

Yes, I suppose you're right about that. But why do you think the Shadow Lord is gathering people? Those enchantments aren't cheap!

Yea, it'll probably all go bad in the end, and we'll find another place. They're all like that in the end.

Well not all of them. Actually the Hallowed Priests of Bastion of Righteous Faith have tended to their duties for some millennia, without a single genocide.

Oh those guys? They're all really preachy and annoying! You do one little thing, and there's all these letters about respecting people.

Admittedly yes, they do react harshly when people summon babbling ghouls, but it's only because they taint all the neighbouring rivers. But it's the daily prayers and honest, simple work which keeps the place free from ghouls standing next to your window and asking you to come outside all night.

Yea, I hear they brought the ghouls in early, so the Domain of the Shadow Lord wouldn't feel empty. But it's fine, you tell them to fuck off once you notice it's a ghoul.

Okay, well good to hear that's sorted...sort of.

And the king's bringing in a new law so ghouls have to identify themselves.

That sounds good, although aren't most of the barons who enforce those laws envoys of the Shadow King?

Yea, they're all in it. Can't trust anyone, can you?

Well as a matter of fact, the Bastion of Righteous Faith have a good track record of not bribing barons. Not a single incident.

Probably because of all those vows of poverty.

Right. Sounds like the vows really work to stop the corruption, and mass enchantments.

What's with the patronising tone? This is what people mean about being 'preachy'.

Sorry, didn't meant to get judgemental. It's just, when you see someone under an enchantment...

Like I said, enchantments don't affect me.

Right, sorry - yes. Well, I'll be off North then.

See you down there!

No, I don't think you will.